Speaking at the 2015 North American Asexuality Conference

I attended the 2015 North American Asexuality Conference in Toronto this year and gave a workshop called “Handling Detractors.”

detractorsMy workshop was very low-key; I just passed out index cards, got people to write down a comment that had been said to them about their asexual-spectrum or aromantic-spectrum identity, and collected them in an envelope, then pulled them out one by one to talk about them with the attendees. I had a pretty big audience and everyone was very responsive; I was only talking maybe half the time. I enjoyed hearing everyone’s perspectives and trying to give some advice on how to handle these comments. It went very well.

Besides my workshop, I had a table for my book.

booksignI collected names to give away two hardcovers and two audio copies of the book. Quite a few people already owned the book and had brought it with them, and they got me to sign it. It was pretty amazing.

Besides those two things, I went to several other workshops: Explaining Asexuality to Non-Aces, Ace-Friendly LGBTQ Organizations, Asexuality and Social Media, and Asexuality and Feminism. Plus I got to make some new friends, hang out at restaurants, collect some great items from other aces, and have some wonderful conversations. Asexual Outreach did a great thing here and I hope they continue to get the message out there.

2015 North American Asexuality Conference

I’m in Toronto! Here I am for the second year of hosting a session at the North American Asexuality Conference.

conferenceAsexual Outreach is hosting this conference and so far everything’s been pretty great–I made it to Canada with a minimum of frustration and confusion and tomorrow I’ll be doing a nice workshop on handling detractors. I think I’m not going to be recording it because of the nature of the material we’ll be covering–just a low-key discussion about what kinds of objections we all face and what we should say in response.

And I even got a cheap place to stay by renting one of the empty dorms at the college! Here I am celebrating that I didn’t get lost going out for food.

100_6504I’d also like to do a raffle to win a copy of my book but we’ll see what happens.

Video: Critique of Romance Tropes

Here’s something a little different from my usual: I’m offering a video about romance tropes in fiction and how they can sometimes send damaging messages to people about what real-life romance is and what place it should occupy in our lives. Informed primarily from an aromantic perspective–meaning that I’m a person who rarely sees herself in fictional narratives and is affected more negatively by certain messages about romance the way it is currently handled in fiction.

The big takeaway from this video is that we need more important friendships in our fiction! And fewer assumptions about the inevitability of romance and the heteronormative assumption!

 

Next Generation Indie Book Award Winner

Well, it looks like I’ve won a fourth award. The book is really cleaning up!

I’m the category winner in the LGBT Category of the Next Generation Indie Book Awards. You can see the announcement on their page.

indiestickerMy category:

LGBT (LESBIAN/GAY/BISEXUAL/TRANSGENDER)

WINNER ($100 PRIZE):

  • The Invisible Orientation: An Introduction to Asexuality, by Julie Sondra Decker

FINALISTS:

  • A Boy Like Me, by Jennie Wood
  • A Song For Lost Angels: How Daddy and Papa Fought to Save Their Family, by Kevin Fisher-Paulson
  • Days of Love, by Elisa Rolle
  • Secrets in Small Towns, by Iza Moreau
  • The Guestbook at Asilomar, by RJ Stastny

I’ll be at the awards ceremony in New York. Hooray!

IPPY Award Silver Medal Winner

It’s official: The Invisible Orientation has won the Silver Medal in the 2015 Independent Publisher Book Awards, in the National category of Sexuality/Relationships.

  • GOLD: Loves Me…Not: How to Survive (and Thrive!) in the Face of Unrequited Love, by Samara O’Shea (February Books)
  • SILVER: The Invisible Orientation: An Introduction to Asexuality, by Julie Sondra Decker (Carrel Books)
  • BRONZE: The Mystery of the Undercover Clitoris: Orgasmic Fingertip Touching Every Woman Craves, by Dr. Sadie Allison (Tickle Kitty Press)

This makes my third book award! Very exciting. I am planning to be in New York for the awards ceremony, though it might be difficult because it’s happening on the day I’m flying into New York for the trip I already planned (for attendance at the Lammys). Wow!

Accepted short story: “On the Inside”

I had actually shelved this story for a long time because I thought maybe it needed to be rewritten in a different way—either with a different point of view choice or even with the perspective of another character. I thought these things mostly based on the feedback of the first editor I sent it to, and I didn’t send it out for a couple years.

Then for some reason I revisited the story and decided it could use a cleanup but that I liked it mostly how it was. I sent it out a couple more times and it got accepted within a month. Huh.

On the Inside” will be published in the next issue of James Gunn’s Ad Astra, though I don’t know when that will be and haven’t done the paperwork yet.

I hope the readers like it. 🙂