This article is by Dina Cheney and includes contributions from me, Anthony Bogaert, and Amanda Pasciucco. It discusses the basics of asexuality, the spectrum, the way aces identify, ace relationships, figuring out if you’re asexual, and how to be an ace ally.
I was a panelist at A Room of One’s Own’s book panel for the I AM ACE Panel Discussion. This panel, organized by Caide Jackson, featured Cody Daigle-Orians with their new book I AM ACE, along with fellow ace activists Ashabi Owagboriaye and me. We covered some asexuality-related topics and some content-creation-related topics and then took questions from the crowd. Very well attended and a lovely time. You can watch it on replay.
This article includes contributions from KJ Cerankowski, me, Catherine Esperanza, and Aubri Lancaster, outlining some misconceptions about asexuality and how trauma and sexual violence are related to the orientation.
I would like to note that one of the quotes from me could, in some interpretations, imply that asexual people who have undergone trauma are not legitimate (because I’m quoted as saying that doesn’t “delegitimize the rest of us”). There is never much space for nuance in these kinds of pieces and that’s not their fault. In my interview I did discuss how important it is to support and make space for asexual people who have a traumatic history and went into detail about the legitimacy of people with that intersection. Anyone, including people with trauma, should be able to access asexuality labels and communities. (As of this writing no one has come out of the woodwork to criticize me for that presentation, but just in case anyone was confused about my position, I do not believe “does not delegitimize the rest of us” is, in isolation, an accurate representation of how I approach this issue.)
I will be making an appearance via Crowdcast at A Room of One’s Own as a panelist with Cody Daigle-Orians and Ashabi Owagboriaye, two other ace activists. Cody’s new book I AM ACE is being celebrated and we will all discuss asexuality, related topics, and activism. We also expect to take questions and comments from participants.
Please join us on March 6, 2023, 7 PM Eastern / 6 PM Central.
I was invited to read Ace Notesearly and provide a blurb. Please check this book out if you or someone you know is asexual and wants some validation and direction coming into the community.
Title: Ace Notes: Tips and Tricks on Existing in an Allo World
Author: Michele Kirichanskaya ISBN:9781839975226 Publisher: Jessica Kingsley Publishers Release Date: March 21, 2023
Generally uplifting and encouraging while not shying away from the realities of living as an asexual person in a sexualized world, Ace Notes gives context to ace experience through interviews, perspectives, quotes, philosophy, and advice for those on the ace spectrum. This book brings an accessible, conversational voice to an underrepresented topic.
I was invited to read Ace and Aro Journeysearly and provide a blurb. Please check this book out if you are interested in adding an important new title to your ace and aro library.
Title: Ace and Aro Journeys: A Guide to Embracing Your Asexual or Aromantic Identity
Author: The Ace and Aro Advocacy Project ISBN: 9781839976384 Publisher: Jessica Kingsley Publishers Release Date: April 21, 2023
Inclusive and emotionally resonant, Ace and Aro Journeys offers an authentic look at asexual and aromantic identity from every imaginable angle. It’s written by people who have lived these specific trials and triumphs, with relatable examples and quotes from diverse ace- and aro-spectrum people, dispensing wisdom regarding processing negativity as well as celebrating ace/aro joy. Aces and aros will see their identities thoroughly explored and validated beyond the usual token statement of “this exists,” while those who want to learn about us will learn how to conceptualize us as we are, not as people with something missing.
This print interview discusses asexual people’s experiences coming to an ace identity and how we are getting more visibility. The article is by Amani Hamed. Also interviewed are Cody Daigle-Orians and CJ George.
I was a featured speaker at the “Beyond Awareness: Creating a Space for Asexual and Aromantic People” panel at the University of Massachusetts’ Stonewall Center, sponsored by SpACE+ (the ace-spectrum group at the university). This panel, organized by Genny Beemyn, featured Yasmin Benoit, August Huber, Leon Friedman, and me.
This long-form print interview discusses what misconceptions asexual people face and educates readers on how to avoid them. The article is by Julie Kliegman. Also interviewed are KJ Cerankowski, Angela Chen, Sherronda J. Brown, Ben Kantt, and David Jay.
I was a little disappointed that the article included this mistake about me: “In addition to identifying as asexual, Decker says she’s romantic, and because of this, people mistakenly assume some very hurtful things about why she isn’t in a relationship.” That should say “aromantic.” I didn’t say I’m romantic. Maybe it was autocorrect.